Wounds From a Friend

Proverbs 27:6
Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.

I have a dear friend who is one of the most painfully honest people I know. If I want to know the awful truth about something, I can trust her to point it out clearly, as she sees it, and from a Christian view-point. I, on the other hand (and we talked about this last week), fear offending people, or hurting their feelings - I hate to be the one to point out the painfully obvious truth. As a result, it can be a bit difficult to hear the truth coming from someone else, when really, I’d rather we just gloss over it, make it look pretty and call it good.

However, I can honestly say I have come to highly value this attribute in my friend. As painful as it is, I know she is not saying it to hurt me or bring me down. Rather, she is trying to help me, to build me up, make me stronger, and to correct me, just as the Bible tells us we are to do. Because she is such a good friend, I know I can trust what she says as being said out of love, not maliciousness.

On the other hand, we tend to be drawn to those people who make us feel good about ourselves, complement us, and tell us that all the things we do wrong are "OK - we all make mistakes, right?" While this is a true statement, we do all make mistakes, it is doing us no good to have this person in our lives - all they are doing is justifying our bad behavior for us and pulling us further down. So, while we may not consider them an "enemy" as we traditionally think of them, they are an enemy of our faith, as they spur us on toward disobedience rather than obedience.

Let’s ask ourselves today: Am I a true friend, one that will speak the truth, in love, encouraging my friends to take the right steps? Or, am I their enemy, always flattering them with my lips, telling them what they want to hear, rather than what they need? And when a friend tells me the hard truth, do I get defensive, hurt, and angry? Or do I allow the truth of what they said to alter my attitude and help me choose to take steps toward a healthier relationship with Christ? I believe we all, for the most part, know what is right and what is wrong. So there is no excuse for us being an enemy to our friends, or getting hurt and offended when our friends point out to us that which we really already knew to be true. Let’s each of us take a look in the mirror and strive to be better friends, shall we?